I ordered a new magazine during a recent "help your favorite Girl Scout" magazine drive. Browsing through I saw that they offered "Cookie," a fairly new magazine that I had glanced through once or twice at the library. It was really reasonable, like $12 for the whole year, so I thought why not. Well, my first issue arrived, and I tell ya, I am NOT impressed. The cover looked promising. "Secrets From The Mom Who Always Looks Together" "1 Meal That Will Give You 4 Days Of Dinners" and "Probiotics - Why It's Good" or something like that. First, that mother that always looks so "together"? Well dear reader, when she has to run out the door and just needs something to "throw" on in a hurry, she always grabs for her "go to" dress. An adorable little wrap item, that you can also own for around $2,000. FOR A DRESS! And her little girl has just been "living" in her new "skinny" jeans (only $145). Uh huh, thanks for those wonderful and realistic tips, biotch. On to the wonder meal that you can make on Sunday in your leisure time and then throw the leftovers together Mon-Wed to make great meals. Here are your starting items - Braised Pork Ala' can't pronounce the rest, Simmered Apple Slices with Fancy stuff about it, and some odd looking Artichoke number. You simply cook this up (on Sunday) and the family eats it, presumably, and then for the next 3 days you take your leftovers and add things to them that you already have in your kitchen, like tartlets and fresh tarragon, and viola~ dinner is served. Hah! And don't even get me started on "Probiotics." Good bacteria? Bad bacteria? In a powder form? As a chewable vitamin? Yup, not caring. There was also an adorable spread on children's new looks for spring. Little dresses for girls (only $305!) and pinstripe vests for boys ($135, what a steal!) As far as I could tell the only reasonable items throughout this magazine were the tights the girls were wearing ($6) and even that is a bit steep for one pair of tights. The best part, an article describing a new "Candy/Ice Cream Shop" in New York City. Shots of Celebrities and Fashionista's and their dressed to the nines children noshing on sundaes and candy, while the mom's lounged on red velvet settee's sipping cocktails before they were all whisked away on horse drawn carriages to the opening of a new "Ralph Lauren" store.
Yup, it's like this magazine has been peering right into my life.